Know Your Mind

TOP 3 THINGS YOU MUST KNOW ABOUT THE MIND

Question from Dr Ravi: I Want to learn Top 3 knowledge points about the subconscious mind.

My Answer: This is my first blog ever! My goal is to answer the questions sent to me by the participants of my ‘Rendezvous with yourself’ program, today’s article will spell out the top 3 things you must know about your Mind.

1) The first thing you must know about the mind is that, the most important priority, job & responsibility of the mind, is to keep you alive. The only way the mind can fulfil its number one responsibility, of keeping you alive, is through FEAR. That’s how we’ve survived as a species, through the test of time.

Why is knowing this important? Knowing this is important, because:

We grew up believing that “if I’m not happy there’s something wrong with me & may be my mind is not doing it’s job well” but that cannot be further from the truth, because the mind’s most important job is not to make you happy, but to keep you alive. So, the next time you don’t feel happy, knowing this truth about the mind, should give you some clarity and relief.

b) Over time, society has adopted some funny concepts “like confidence is the absence of fear” or “To be the best, I must be fearless” and the likes of it. FEARLESSNESS DOES NOT EXIST, because the mind’s ability to scan for and detect a threat or danger to life is ever present and that is what allows it to keep you alive and so FEAR will always be present, even when & if, it is not heightened.

2) The second thing you must know about the mind is that because the mind’s most important job is to keep us alive, its number one need is that of safety. Through the entire journey of evolution, connection has always been a constant source of providing safety & helped humans survive as a species. The idiom “Safety in numbers” originated from this psychological understanding that the need for safety was met through the power of connection. During the prehistoric ages and even after, banishment was considered as the worst punishment of all kinds, because it quite literally meant death for the individual. Even today, time-out’s given by teachers and parents create a very deep impact on the subconscious minds of kids, that lasts through out their life & interferes with every area of their life, until and unless it is resolved, in and for their minds.

Connection brings in safety, while rejection makes one feel unsafe. THEREFORE, THE MOST IMPORTANT NEED OF THE HUMAN MIND IS THAT OF CONNECTION AND THE GREATEST FEAR OF ALL, IS THE FEAR OF REJECTION.

Knowing this should help you to understand that loneliness is a real problem, even in todays modern world and no one can truly be happy if they are lonely.

Loneliness creates isolation and isolation is disconnection and for the human mind disconnection translates to unsafety and is perceived as a threat to life. Someone who truly understands this message, will never buy into the juvenile nonsense that floats around like “you don’t need anyone, and if you do, it means that you are weak and dependent.” Or “ Learn to live alone”.

Please read this article, as many times as you need to, to understand the gravity of this message .

3) The third thing I’d like to introduce my readers to, about the human mind, is not common knowledge. It’s a novel concept and yet my experience as a mind expert has taught me that this is an extremely important point to note. I’m going to attempt to turn this esoteric theory into a simple one by using a couple of analogies.

Let’s take your hair for example. How do you feel about your hair today?

Do you see how and why this question even though it’s a weird one, is absolutely relevant?

It’s relevant because, we feel differently about our hair, so often. It is a matter of pride for the youth and factor for worry for the aging adult of today. We can clearly see and acknowledge that our hair also has a mind of its own ;) .

There are good hair days and there are bad hair days and it fluctuates more than it stays constant. The way you feel about your hair, changes with these fluctuations with your hair. Even the way others feel about your hair, constantly changes. A long overdue haircut, becomes the first thing people notice about you and they don’t hesitate sharing what they think and feel about it, even if you haven’t asked for their opinion. We also have a wide variety of issues to deal with when it comes to our hair.

So, what does this show you & what does this mean? & how is it related to knowing something important about the mind?

As an exercise in self-awareness, I highly urge you to write out your answers (best choice) or at least shout out your answers (if you refuse to make that extra effort of writing for yourself), before you start reading my explanation in the next paragraph and then compare them later, so that you understand the gap that was and which was bridged thereby, upgrading your awareness.

Moving on to reading my answers to the question of what the analogy actually shows you and means and its connection & revelations about the human mind.

This hair analogy reveals some powerful insights and they are:

1. that you are in a relationship, with your hair.

2. you are also in a relationship with others [ external factors, people who give their opinion about your haircut or how your hair looks today] and that impacts your sub conscious mind and how you feel about yourself (i.e. only if you’re being truly candid with yourself. )

3. Just like you are in a relationship with your hair, you are also in a relationship with your mind.

In-fact, you are in a relationship with everything and everyone in your life and the quality of your life is defined by the quality of your relationships. You are in a relationship with your mind, with your body, with food, with money, with the people in your life, with almost everything...even the air that you breathe.

Up until now, you possibly didn’t even know, that you were in a relationship with your mind and that’s absolutely ok, because weren’t ever taught that. But now that you know this, you can turn this awareness into a transformative experience for yourself.

Just like the way you felt about your hair ( which is essentially your relationship with your hair) has evolved through the different stages of childhood, adolescence and adulthood in your life, so has your relationship with your mind, evolved, whether you were conscious of it or not. All your relationships are constantly fluctuating and changing because you’ve gone through life experiences that have changed you from, what you once were, to who you are today. During our life journey so far, our focus was lost and we missed out on recognizing and therefore honoring this extremely important relationship that we share with our mind.

The mind is the sentient energy that brings our brain to life and it is no different from the heartbeat that brings the heart to life.

Our mind is not our adversary. It is not your enemy or in opposition to you or what you want, even though it may feel like it sometimes, when we feel like it doesn’t support us to do what we want it to do. In reality, your mind also seeks to feel good, just as much as you do. Just like a child, the mind is deeply knowing in some ways and naive and lost in other ways.

Often the thing that the mind does to help you, ends in actually hurting you. I’m sure you’ve experienced this in your other human relationships as well, where you’ve had the best of intentions but found yourself hurting the person more.

Just like, in any other relationship, hurt simply happens, whether from your end or from the other end, whether intentionally or unintentionally, the same holds true for your relationship with your mind.

To understand this better, I want you to consider a relationship you have with an important person, in your life. It could be with your best friend, your parents, your siblings, your children, it could be with anyone who is currently important in your life. Hurt has been and is a part of that relationship, for you and for them. Hurt exists and that hurt needs to be healed. This concept of healing emotional hurt is still unfamiliar to most of us and we do not know how to go about it. How to do it, is whole new, vast and other topic altogether, but for now my intention is to bring, to your attention to this fact that you are in a relationship with your mind.

Walking around with this brand new awareness that you are in a relationship with your mind is a total game changer, because it means that …you’re no longer just reacting to your thoughts—you’re actually in dialogue with them. It means that not every thought gets to be the boss of you. You can observe, question, comfort, or even challenge what your mind says, just like you would in any relationship.

This awareness brings in responsiveness too. If your mind is anxious, you don’t have to be anxious—you can notice it, tend to it, and guide it.

Suddenly you’re not trapped in your head, you’re partnering with it.

A Total shift. From “Why am I like this?” to “Hey, mind, I see you. What’s going on?”

You can dialogue with your mind so that you're no longer a passive participant in your own inner world—you’re an active contributor and team member. Instead of being dragged around by every anxious spiral, harsh judgment, or random narrative, you can apply this knowledge , and ask:

"Is this really true?"

"Where is this coming from?"

"What does my mind need right now?"

It’s like realising that your mind isn't you, it's a voice that’s been with you for a long time, sometimes wise, sometimes scared, sometimes loud and messy.

And when that shift happens, you start moving through the world differently...

with More Gentleness. More Kindness. More Presence. More Choice. More Support . More Confidence. More Power.